Only in America

OnlyinAmerica...canapizzagettoyourhousefasterthanan
ambulance...

OnlyinAmerica...dopeopleorderdoublecheeseburgers,alargefry,and
adietcoke...

OnlyinAmerica...dobanksleavebothdoorsopenandthenchainthepens
tothecounters...

OnlyinAmerica...doweleavecarsworththousandsofdollarsinthe
drivewayandleaveuselessthingsandjunkinboxesinthegarage...

OnlyinAmerica...doweuseansweringmachinestoscreencallsandthen
havecallwaitingsowewon'tmissacallfromsomeonewedidn'twantto
talktointhefirstplace...

OnlyinAmerica...dowebuyhotdogsinpackagesoftenandbunsin
packagesofeight...

OnlyinAmerica...doweusetheword"politics"todescribetheprocessso
well:"Poli"inlatinmeaning"many"and"tics"meaning"blood-suckingcreatures"...